That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Randomize
