I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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