what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize