So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
