I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
