Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
