i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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