The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
3 2 1 whiskey
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
