I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
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