at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
