Don't you send me to vm
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
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