i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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