Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
