I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
