That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize
