My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
wow bdsm is so cute
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
