I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
i think we sleep fucked last night...
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
