forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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