If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize