This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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