She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
