shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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