Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
