I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
