it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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