Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
