I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
