Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
