2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize