wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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