I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
The beer is more important than you right now.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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