You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize