im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
