Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
