What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
