i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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