Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
