She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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