You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize