I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
