out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
