I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Randomize
