More tranny stories later!
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
