**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
