My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
