I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize