Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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