i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
