Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
