How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
two words...techno handjob
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
